Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Palin Power!!!

So... I forced myself to sit through the speeches by everyone's favorite drag queen Rudy Guiliani & America's newest & feistiest VP sweetheart, Sarah Palin. (Applause)

Despite being an out-of-left-field pick, Gov.Palin doesn't seem horrible & she definitely doesn't exude soul-sucking evil & despair like our current vice-president. However, America cannot afford the destructive economic & military policies of a continued extremist Republican agenda.

It's a shame that John McCain himself ruined her special moment- by coming out and looking like he had absolutely no idea where the hell he was or how to get out.

Sitting through the entire Republican convention would be like a nightmare for me. On most issues I consider myself moderate, but the idea that people still can get excited by the Republican Party scares the living crap out of me. How can anyone think that the Neocon approach of the past 8 years has improved our economy, our military, or our overall state of affairs? By all measures & observations, it simply hasn't.

Whatever... The debates are the next spectacle to behold. Here are my predictions:

• In the heat of argument, Joe Biden pimp-slaps Sarah Palin, and then she shoots him with an assult rifle. His impenetrable teeth block the bullets & he escapes.

• John McCain's latent Manchurian mind-programming kicks in & he tries to eliminate Obama.
Barack Hussein Obama dons his 'Traditional Muslim Garb' and calls out to the jihadists who drop from the ceiling.

I can't wait!!!!!!

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